It's funny to think about what it would be like if we spoke and wrote exactly as that ludicrous little voice inside our head. No filter – just straight from the brain to the word making machine. I like to think that I do so, keeping people around me with tight abs, get it?
Just think, we would use a lot less white-out and be much less inclined to apologize if we did. We would probably end up with tougher skin and plenty of those *slap* "coulda had a V8!" moments (https://youtu.be/_VZxE6pW_to for all my international friends, not in the know). The cosmetics world would also thank us; plenty of lotion and Botox jobs to go around thanks to brutal honesty about saggy skin and wrinkles.
This brings me to the real reason for writing this first post. It falls under the category of Geography, but more than anything it's about the stupid questions we ask ourselves, google, and others when we have no idea how to survive things such as WINTER. Clearly, my main concern on my initial voyage overseas to Germany.
Instead of me brutally mocking myself, and others that fall within this agenda, I’ll let you read and do it yourself.
Here's a funny list of questions, from my extremely intelligent friends and I, that slipped through the filter or have been jotted down:
How do I tie a scarf? Like a shoe?
Can I go outside without a sweatshirt on when I see the sun in the winter?
Where is Germany?
Great Britain is somewhere in Europe right?
Sorry officer, I didn’t know I had to pay for public transportation????!!!
"What time do they turn on the Northern Lights?"
"Why did they build so many ruined castles around here?"
"How far above sea level are we? (While on a cruise ship)"
"What time is the midnight buffet?"
Do they speak Spanish in Portugal? Wait, they also speak Spanish in Spain right? Or is it Th-panish?
Can you go outside when it snows really hard?
Do I need an umbrella? (It’s pouring rain and/or snow outside and we’re walking to the train)
Do you guys celebrate Thanksgiving? What about 4th of July?
What do people do when there's no sun?
How does anyone manage to look cute in the winter?
Since we’re going clubbing, you’re not bringing a jacket right? (Are you crazy! Preface, it’s still winter)
Is everyone considered European in Europe?
Where can I buy Mac n Cheese? Do they have Costco here?
Everything in Europe is super close right?
Do they have sushi in Germany?
Sorry I'm getting a bit carried away, but you can't say you've never got a little self giggle going asking yourself stuff like this... don't lie... I'm watching you... crossing your toes doesn't count! Guilty.